With the rise in popularity of social media, many parents have concerns about their kids using platforms like Facebook. Facebook requires users to be at least 13 years old, but some younger kids still want a way to message their friends. This has led some parents to wonder if there is a kid-friendly alternative to Facebook Messenger.
The risks of kids using regular Facebook Messenger
There are a few potential risks that come with kids under 13 using the regular Facebook Messenger app:
Interacting with strangers
On Facebook, users can connect with anyone else on the platform. This means kids could end up interacting with strangers, which raises safety concerns. The messaging component presents another avenue for inappropriate contact with unknown adults.
Exposure to inappropriate content
Facebook is designed for a teen and adult audience. As such, kids may come across content that is not age-appropriate, like offensive language, nudity, violence, or mature subject matter. The open nature of messaging also means kids could be sent inappropriate content directly.
Cyberbullying
Bullying is a big issue among youth today, and cyberbullying can be particularly problematic. Messaging apps like Facebook Messenger provide a platform for classmates or peers to harass each other. This can involve sending cruel messages, threats, or sharing embarrassing information/photos without consent.
Overuse and distraction
Some parents worry that access to messaging at a young age could promote overuse of social media. This can distract kids from offline activities and interactions that are important for development. It may also lead to compulsive checking habits later in life.
Sharing personal information
When signing up for Facebook, users are asked to provide personal details like their real name, birthdate, location, and contact information. Kids may not have the judgement to keep this information private when chatting with strangers or even friends.
Digital footprint and reputation
Any photos, videos, messages, posts, or comments shared via Facebook Messenger become part of a user’s digital footprint. Inappropriate or embarrassing content linked to a child’s real identity could affect their reputation both now and later in life.
Is there a kid-friendly Facebook Messenger alternative?
Currently, there is no official Facebook Messenger app designed just for kids under 13. However, Facebook does own a messaging platform called Messenger Kids that provides a safer experience for young children.
Messenger Kids overview
Messenger Kids is a free mobile messaging app released by Facebook in 2017. It is targeted at kids between 6 and 12 years old (or younger with parental approval).
The app allows kids to do the following:
- Message friends who their parent has approved
- Send photos, videos, and other fun effects like stickers
- Make video calls with messaging contacts
- Play games and use Augmented Reality masks
Messenger Kids was built from the ground up with younger users in mind. It has a simple interface and was designed with heavy input from developmental psychologists and data privacy experts.
Parental controls
A key aspect of Messenger Kids is the ability for parents to manage their child’s account and oversee messaging. Parents must download the Messenger Kids Parent app and link it to their child’s account.
This gives them the power to:
- Approve new contacts
- See a history of images, videos, and messages sent and received
- Enable or disable some app features
- Set time limits and pause the account
Kids cannot connect with unknown users or hide messages from their parent. This provides significant security and supervision compared to regular messaging apps.
No ads or in-app purchases
Messenger Kids does not show any advertising to its underage users. There are also no options for kids to make in-app purchases like sticker packs or games. This avoids exposing children to marketing tactics.
COPPA compliant data collection
The app was designed to comply with the U.S. Children’s Online Privacy Protection Act (COPPA). This means the developers limit data gathering to what is strictly necessary to provide the service.
Facebook states they do not use any Messenger Kids data for advertising purposes. They also claim not to automatically move kids over to a Facebook account once they turn 13.
Other kid-friendly messaging options
In addition to Messenger Kids, there are a few other options that provide safer messaging for children under 13:
Apple Messages
The default messaging app on iOS allows kids to text, chat, and make video calls. It has no advertising and parents can set restrictions on who kids message and when. Group chats are also disabled by default for child accounts.
Signal
This private messaging app uses end-to-end encryption to protect chats. It has a simple interface and optional blocking of explicit media. Parents would need to provide the child’s phone to set up restrictions.
Skype
Skype works across platforms for free video calls and instant messaging. Parents can get notified of new contacts and turn on filtering of inappropriate links/files.
Viber
On Viber, parents can control privacy settings and restrict messaging to an approved contacts list. There are also options to limit chat times and hide profile photos.
WhatsApp requires users to be at least 16 years old. However, it does provide group chat control and media download restrictions that could help keep kids safe.
Life360
This family tracking app has a built-in messaging component for parents to stay in contact with kids. Location monitoring provides an extra level of supervision and safety.
Key factors in choosing a messaging app for kids
When evaluating messaging options for children, there are a few key factors for parents to consider:
Age range
Some apps are designed for pre-teens, while others are more appropriate for teens nearing the 13+ threshold for regular messaging platforms. Consider your child’s maturity and needs.
Parental controls
The ability to manage contacts, time limits, notifications and other app features is ideal to ensure proper use.
Privacy protections
Look for apps that limit data collection and clearly explain how children’s information is used. End-to-end encryption provides the highest level of protection.
Ad-free experience
Kids should be able to safely use an app without being exposed to marketing tactics and in-app purchases.
Cyberbullying prevention
Controls around sharing photos/videos, hiding contacts, and blocking users help prevent harassment and abuse. Moderation for inappropriate content is also beneficial.
Platform access
Apps available across iOS and Android provide the most convenient access across different devices.
What age should kids start using messaging apps?
There is no set age when kids should start using messaging platforms. Child development experts suggest evaluating the following factors:
- Is your child showing an interest in connecting with peers online?
- Do they demonstrate responsibile use of smartphones/tablets?
- Are you able to discuss online safety and supervise their activities?
- Does your child tend to obey limits and rules you set on technology use?
In most cases, messaging is not recommended before age 9 or 10. But maturity level and parental discretion should play a role.
For younger kids under 9, parental management apps like Life360 that allow emergency contact with family could be beneficial. Ultimately, you know your child best.
Setting ground rules for kids using messaging apps
If you allow your child to use a messaging app, it’s crucial to set age-appropriate ground rules. Some guidelines include:
- Get parent approval for every new contact
- Only message known friends and family
- Never share personal details like address, school, etc.
- Don’t send pictures of yourself without asking
- Tell parent if you see anything upsetting or inappropriate
- Only use app during specific hours/time limits
- Let parent access your messages at any time
- Don’t install any extra apps or plugins
Keep lines of communication open and remind kids that rules are meant to protect them, not take away fun communication. Checking in regularly about messaging behaviors is also a good idea.
Fostering digital literacy and citizenship
Beyond just setting limits, parents play an important role in shaping their kids’ digital literacy and citizenship. Some tips include:
- Share examples of positive online behavior
- Discuss being kind online and not cyberbullying
- Explain importance of protecting personal information
- Talk about seeking help from trusted adults over social media companies if issues arise
- Consider signing an informal contract about tech use expectations
- Note that apps and internet use are privileges to be earned through responsible use
Developing good digital habits early on can help kids be smart, safe, and ethical users as technology becomes more embedded in their lives.
Conclusion
While no messaging options are completely risk-free, Messenger Kids provides a solid platform for kids under 13 to text in a monitored environment. With parental controls and no ads/purchases, it balances safety with the fun of connecting with friends.
For younger children, Apple Messages or family location apps may be more appropriate. Above all else, open communication, reasonable limits, and modeling responsible use are the best ways parents can guide their kids in the digital world. With care and supervision, messaging can be an enjoyable part of childhood.