The Short Answer
No, you cannot delete a Facebook message after you have sent it. Once a Facebook message has been sent, it cannot be deleted or removed from the recipient’s inbox. However, there are a couple of things you can do if you regret sending a message:
- On desktop: Click the three dots next to the message and select “Remove for You.” This will remove the message from your inbox, but not the recipient’s.
- On mobile: Long press on the message and select “Remove for You.” Just like on desktop, this only removes it from your view.
- Unsend the message within 10 minutes of sending. Facebook allows you a short window to unsend a message after it’s been sent.
So in summary – no, you cannot fully delete a sent Facebook message. But you do have some options to remove the message from your own view or unsend for a brief period after sending.
Explaining Why You Can’t Delete Sent Facebook Messages
The reason you are unable to delete a Facebook message after sending it is related to how the Facebook messaging system is engineered. Some key points:
- Facebook delivers messages immediately. As soon as you hit send, the message is delivered to the recipient’s inbox.
- Messages are synced across devices. Once a message is sent, it will be viewable from the recipient’s Facebook on all their devices.
- Facebook’s infrastructure stores all messages. The messages you send are replicated across Facebook’s servers and cached locally on recipients’ devices.
This instant and distributed delivery approach makes it impossible for Facebook to simply “take back” or delete a message after you’ve sent it. The message has already been delivered and stored in too many places. Trying to erase it could cause inconsistencies and confusion.
Some other messaging platforms like Gmail allow you to delete sent messages because they don’t deliver messages immediately. Gmail holds your message on its own servers until the recipient logs in. This creates a small window where you can delete the message. But Facebook’s real-time messaging precludes this option.
Your Options for “Deleting” Sent Facebook Messages
Although you can’t fully delete a sent Facebook message, you do have some options to reduce your exposure to messages you regret sending:
Remove for You
If you access Facebook on a desktop browser, you can remove a sent message from your own inbox while leaving it in the recipient’s inbox. To do this:
- Click the three dots next to the sent message.
- Select “Remove for You” from the dropdown menu.
This will remove the message from your inbox. The recipient can still see it, but you won’t see it in your inbox anymore.
Unsend
Facebook allows you to “unsend” messages for up to 10 minutes after they are initially sent. To unsend a Facebook message:
- On desktop: Click the three dots next to the message and select “Unsend.”
- On mobile: Long press on the message and choose “Unsend.”
This will permanently delete the message, removing it from both your inbox and the recipient’s. But you only have a 10 minute window to use this feature.
Report as Spam
If too much time has passed for the Unsend feature, you can still report your own message as spam. This also removes it from your inbox. The recipient will still be able to see the message, but it tags it as spam to indicate you’re retracting the message.
Block the Recipient
Blocking the recipient prevents them from seeing message history between you. They also won’t be able to receive new messages from you. So blocking effectively “deletes” the message from both sides, although the recipient may have already seen it before you blocked them.
Why You Can’t Fully Delete Sent Messages
Being unable to completely delete sent Facebook messages can be annoying. But there are some good reasons why Facebook doesn’t allow this:
- Accountability: Not being able to delete messages creates accountability. You can’t pretend you never sent something when there’s evidence.
- Prevents confusion: If messages could be selectively deleted, it would be confusing for recipients missing part of a conversation.
- Legal reasons: Facebook needs message history for legal/regulatory purposes in some cases.
- Technical limitations: Instant message delivery makes deletes impractical at scale.
So while the inability to delete messages might be inconvenient if you regret sending something, there are some good reasons for this policy. It helps maintain messaging integrity and accountability.
Tips for Avoiding Regrettable Messages
Since you can’t fully delete sent Facebook messages, the best policy is to avoid sending messages you might regret in the first place. Here are some tips to help with that:
- Don’t message when emotional or upset. Wait until you calm down to send anything potentially regrettable.
- Read messages aloud before sending. Hearing it out loud can help you catch problematic messages.
- Avoid sarcasm or inside jokes. These don’t translate well in writing.
- Be polite and tactful. Don’t say anything you wouldn’t say to someone’s face.
- Don’t make assumptions. Clarify if you’re unsure how a message might be received.
- Remember the recipient when writing. Keep their perspective in mind.
Exercising caution, tact, and empathy when messaging can prevent sending things you’ll later regret. The old saying holds true: “Think before you speak.”
What About Deleting Messages You Received?
Everything we’ve covered so far applies to messages you have sent. What about deleting messages you’ve received from other people on Facebook?
You have more options for removing messages you’ve received, including:
- Delete individual messages: You can delete incoming messages individually.
- Delete full conversations: On mobile, you can delete entire conversations from your inbox.
- Block the sender: This will remove the message history and prevent new messages.
However, deleting or blocking only removes the messages from your inbox view. The sender can still see their side of the message history. The messages also continue existing in Facebook’s infrastructure. So full deletion isn’t possible.
Third-Party Tools for Deleting Messages
Various third-party tools and browser extensions claim they can help delete Facebook messages. Examples include:
- Social Book Post Manager
- Cleaner for Facebook
- DeleteFB
However, most of these tools don’t actually delete messages from Facebook’s servers. They can only remove messages from your view or reports messages as spam. The end result is similar to using Facebook’s own “Remove for You” or “Unsend” options.
Some paid tools claim they can fully delete messages, even long after sending them. But this would require hacking into Facebook’s infrastructure, which goes against Facebook’s policies and could get your account suspended. There currently aren’t any legitimate tools for bulk deleting old messages.
Summary and Conclusion
In summary:
- You cannot fully delete Facebook messages after sending them.
- You can remove messages from your own view using “Remove for You.”
- The Unsend feature allows deleting for both parties but only for 10 minutes.
- Blocking or reporting as spam helps retract messages.
- But messages continue existing in Facebook’s infrastructure.
- You have more options for deleting received messages.
- Third-party deletion tools don’t work as claimed.
Being unable to delete messages can be inconvenient, but promotes accountability. Your best recourse is being cautious when messaging and utilizing the limited deletion options Facebook does provide.
The bottom line: Think before you send. Once that message is out there, it’s out there for good.